BECCA

02:57 pm:

yea so i thought things with me and chris were good, but i feel like he has been avoiding me. if hes gonna break up with me, id rather him do it now, before i get hurt  really bad. i love him alot!!!!!! and that doesnt seem to fit. i kno im probably just over reacting, but it makes me sad, i havent seen him in 3 days and we go to the same school. i wanna be the girlfriend that makes him want to wait by the phone, and look for me at school. but i cant change him, i miss him so much and i want things to last. im happy with him. but it hurts to feel like im single, or dating a guy at a different school. things just suck right now. everything does. i hope he still loves me.......

~becca

01:40 pm: omg im sooo confused... i really like a guy named tyler. but last night we started getting close and then i pulled away. its all because of another guy, we made out and held hands sometimes. then when i asked him if he liked me, he said no, not that way. i see you as a best friend that i can hit on. what kind of crap is that? now i dont want to make a fool of myself with tyler. I NEED SOME ADVICE....

~BECCA

01:00 pm: OMG im soooo bored. but im really happy cause my partys in 1 day.... aaaaaahhhhhhhh.. its gonna rock (hopefully)

12:11 pm: can you?
CAN YOU FIX ME?
MY WORRIES, THOUGHTS, AND HEART?

IF I WAS DOWN WOULD YOU PICK ME UP?
OR DROP ME LOWER?
IF I WAS CRYING WOULD YOU DRY MY TEARS
OR MAKE IT WORSE?

MY HEART IS SHATTERED
CAN YOU FIX IT?
WILL YOU HELP ME ON MY WAY
OR LEAVE ME STRANDED?

CAN YOU TAKE ON THE CHALLENGE
I NEED YOU NOW MORE THAN EVER

CAN YOU SEE INSIDE OF ME?
OR JUST MY MASK?
LOOK INTO MY EYES,
YOU WILL SEE THE TRUTH

WILL YOU BE MY SHOULDER
THAT I CAN REST MY HEAD?

WILL YOU WRAP MY WOUNDS
OR RIP THEM OPEN
JUST TO SEE ME BLEED?

I NEED YOU TO COMFORT ME
IN MY TIME OF NEED

YOU HAVE NO IDEA
NEITHER DO I

DO YOU WANT TO HELP ME?
FIND MY ANSWERS?
OR WALK AWAY LEAVING ME BROKEN?

CAN YOU FIX ME?
ALL OF ME?
PLEASE TRY YOUR HARDEST

I NEED YOU TO COMFORT ME

MY HEART IS SHATTERED
CAN YOU FIX IT?

FILL ME AND MAKE ME WHOLE

11:46 am: Doesn't it seem ridiculous to anyone else?
1) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural
things like eyeglasses, polyester, liposuction and air conditioning.

2) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3)
Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy
behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has
legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4) Straight
marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women
are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is
still illegal.

5) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if
gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britney Spears' 55-hour
just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6) Straight marriages
are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile
couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our
orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.

7) Obviously, gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8)
Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours,
the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's
why we have only one religion in America.

9) Children can never
succeed without both a male and a female role model at home. That's why
we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10)
Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never
adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the
service-sector economy, or longer life spans...



Re-post this if you believe that laws against gay marriage are just plain stupid.

04:00 am:

ok so its like almost 4 and me, staci, sammi, laura, and amber are all just hanging out at laura's house. we got loaded on energy drinks and candy we cant sleep. and in about 6 hours were going to my church. i cant wait... so far we went to the schools festival and then to the fireworks and now just hanging out and watching movies and im just hangin out watchin music videos... its fun. we talked to jeff on the phone for more than an hour! it was interesting. and we played ding dong ditch on justin wilson... that was funny and then sam almost had an asthma attack. wow this has been the best day out of summer so far. too bad its the last. im ready for school to start. i get to see everyone. today is going to be lots of fun. we have our church picnic and then we are all just going to have fun and mess around. my summer has been a mix of disaster and bordom... but now im just happy to get out of all the problems that are happening... well at least for a few hours a day. thats good enough for me. but for now only time will tell.

xoxox
~becca

12:40 pm: I’ve gone crazy
More along the lines of insanity
Along with my mom
Both on the same page

Going crazy
Just waiting for something to change

The chaos
Confusing what we see

The screams wake me to reality
Dreams of a fantasy world
Where we can run away

A place where fairy tales
Come alive

Tired of spending our lives in tears
Locked away in a secret place

Friends are supportive
They want me to be strong
Holding on for tomorrow

Strength is something i have little of
It’s all gone
Wasted in the years
More or less in tears

Thoughts of a new life
Fill my heart with joy

Puts a smile on my face
And the shine in my eyes

I’ve lost my caring personality
Towards my family

Mostly for my father
For putting these feelings
In me

I can’t find my prize
The reason for my quest
Or just the questions

All feeling empty and meaningless
Leaving me consumed
By fear, hate, and sadness

We’ve gone crazy
More along the lines of insanity
Both on the same page

Going crazy
Waiting for
Something to change

We learn to hide
Our emotions from the world..

05:46 pm: its not quite a song but, oh well
it still needs a title...


Suicidal mom hurting my world, my friends, and my life

Needing some one to talk to
I feel like im annoying the world around me
Tears form and tears fall
I need an escape from this life
I need a lover, or just a friend
Some one to listen and understand
These feelings of pain,
The thoughts of sex
Running through my body

Not knowing the answers
To all my questions
Drive me insane

A mood-changing father
At my side

Like a voice in my head
Feeding the nightmare that is my life
At times loving and sensitive

Others, harsh and cold

Making me feel that they want to turn their backs
and walk away… forever

all the screams, voices, and abuse
hurting…
killing my soul

falling further from the life i love
the life i want…

all i know is the pain that darkens my heart.

I cant seem to numb the pain

My eyes tearing
My hands shaking
All as i write these words,
For all to know

My breath is gone
My blood rushing
With every beat of my heart that is
Quickly fading and breaking…

I must escape

Songs playing on the radio sing my pain

I can’t shake away these feelings of loneliness

Im torn and beat
Feeling worthless and low
Exhausted from my efforts
And nothing to show

Just the tears in my eyes
And blood on my wrists
Once again something inside me screams

I need a lover, or just a friend
Someone to listen and understand
The feelings of misery,
Linger over me
The thoughts and dreams of sex
All running wild in my mind

My world is too overwhelming
Living with a suicidal mother
Always fighting with my
Mood changing father

12:14 pm: Full Name:


Single or Taken:

Nickname:


Height:

Hair:


Eyes:

Siblings:


What Are You Wearing Right Now?

Where do you live?

Gender:


Lefty or Righty:



Do You Do ?


> Who's The Last Person That You Called?

Favorite Sports?

Favorite sport to watch?


What are you afraid of?

What Are You Listening To Right Now?

Favorite Subject in School:


CD or Tape:

Animals You Have?


HAVE YOU EVER:

Bungee Jumped?
Broken the Law?



GIRLS FILL OUT ON GUYS:

Boxers or Briefs:

Long or Short Hair:

Tall or Short:


Six Pack or Built Arms:



Good or Bad Guy:



Ears Pierced or Not:


Tan or Fair:


Dimples?



Stubble or Neatly Shaved:


Hat or No Hat:



FOR GUYS TO FILL OUT ABOUT S:

Painted or Plain nails?

Cute n' Mysterious or Wild n'

Dressy or Casual?

Dark or light Hair?

Long or Short hair?

Dark or Light Eyes?

Long or Short Nails?

Good or Bad ?

Curvy or Straight Hair?

Up or Down Hair?

Jewelry or None?

Tall or Short?

Pants or Dresses?

Tan or fair?

Freckles or None?


Indoor Chick or Party Outdoor Chick?


Accent or Canadian?



EVERYONE:

Shy or Outgoing:



Chocolate or White Milk:




Root Beer or Dr. Pepper:




Mud or Jell-O-Wrestling:

Talking or Listening:


Day or Night:




Summer or Winter:



Cake or Pie:




Gold or Silver:


Diamond or Pearl:


Sunrise or Sunset:

Have You Ever Broken/Sprained/Fractured Anything?



Do You Have Any Piercings:


Do You Hate Anybody?


Favorite Music Artist(s):

What Do You Dream About?

Who do you tell your dreams to?

Who Is The Quietest Person You Know?

03:39 pm: Fill it out

1. Have we kissed?
2. Do you want to?
3. What would you like our relationship to be?
4. Have we dated?
5. Did you like it?
6. Do you want to date?
7. Are we close friends?
8. Would you be here if I needed you?
9. Are you attracted to me?
10. Mentally, sexually, or both?
11. Do you love me?

Appearance
Do you like my...
12. Face?
13. Eyes?
14. Lips?
15. Body?
16. Arms?
17. Legs?
18. Clothes?
19. Ass?
20. Hands?
21. Hair?

Do think I'm...
22. Sexy?
23. Beautiful?
24. Hot?
25. Cute?

Personality
Do you think I'm...
26. Crazy?
27. Nice?
28. Fun to be around?
29. Funny?
30. Annoying?

Would you..
31. Share chocolate with me?
32. Spend a weekend with me?
33. Alone?
34. Hook up with me?
35. Have sex with me?
36. Care if I ran away?
37. Care if I died?
38. Miss me if I left?
39. Hang out with me?

What would you do if...
40. I kissed you?
41. You found out I was missing?
42. You found out I was in the hospital?
43. You found out I was dead?
44. I cried?
45. I asked you for help?
46. I told you I loved you?
47. I told you I hated you?
48. Someone told you I wanted you to kiss me?
49. Someone told you I had a crush on you?

In the last week, have you...
50. Wanted to kiss me?
51. Wanted to see me?
52. Wanted to have sex with me?
53. Wanted to tell me you loved me?
54. Wanted to spend alone time with me?
55. Wanted to get to know me better?
56. Thought about me?
57. Missed me?
58. Wanted me?
59. Seen me?
60. Kissed me?

Have I...
61. Kissed you?
62. Hugged you?
63. Told you I loved you?
64. Made you happy?
65. Made you sad?
66. Made you angry?
67. Made you feel better if you were upset?

Are you...
68. Happy you know me?
69. Going to post this is so I can answer it?



love ya all
~becca

10:33 am: [Marital Status] none
[Shoe size] 7.5
[Parents still together] yea
[Siblings] 1 sister
[Pets] 3 dogs and 2 fish
FAVORITES
[Color] hot pink and black(sexyness)
[Number] dunno
[Animal] snakes
[Drinks] milk shakes
[Soda] coke or mt. dew
[Book] any
[Flower] roses or lilies
DO YOU
[Color your hair?] no
[Twirl your hair?] sometimes when im bored
[Have tattoos?] nope
[Have Piercings?] yea my ears
[Cheat on tests/homework?] only on homework
[Drink/Smoke?] nope
[Like roller coasters?] oh yea
[Wish you could live somewhere else?] yea somewhere warm
[Want more piercings?] yup! (belly button, nose, tongue, lip, and maybe a gauge)
[Like cleaning?] depends on my mood
[Write in cursive or print?] print
[Own a web cam?] no
[Know how to drive?] a little
[Own a cell phone?] no
[Ever get off the damn computer?] when my dad makes me
HAVE U EVER
[Been in a fist fight?] yea with a guy
[Considered a life of crime?] ummm…dunno
[Considered being a hooker?] no
[Lied to someone?] yea
[Been in love?] defiantly
[Made out with JUST a friend?] yup
[Been in lust?] all the time…
[Used someone] no
[Been used?] yea
[Been cheated on?] nope
[Kicked someone in the nuts?] bunches of times
[Stolen anything?] no
[Held a gun] yea
CURRENTS
[Current clothing] my pjs
[Current mood] happy and bored
[Current taste] coke
[What you currently smell like] chlorine from my pool
[Current hair] a mess
[Current thing I ought to be doing] dunno
[Current cd in stereo] my mix or system of a down
[Last book you read] bible
[Last movie you saw] jeepers creepers 1and 2
[Last thing you ate] chocolate poptarts
[Last person you talked to on the phone] tabitha
[Do drugs?] nope
[Believe there is life on other planets?] sometimes
Remember your first love?] no
[Still love him/her?] dunno
[Read the newspaper?] no
[Have any gay or lesbian friends?] yea all of them basically
[Believe in miracles?] yea
[Do well in school?] sometimes
[Wear hats] yea
[Hate yourself?] it depends on the situation
[Have an obsession?] yup
[Collect anything?] candles
[Have a best friend?] dunno…
[Close friends?] a lot
[Like your handwriting?] not really
[Care about looks] no
LOVE LIFE
[First crush] cant remember
[First kiss] a boy…
[Do you believe in love at first sight?] yea
[Do you believe in "the one?"] yea
[Are you a tease?] i can be
[Too shy to make the first move?] yea right…
ARE U A
[Daydreamer] of corse
[Bitch/Asshole] not really
[sarcastic] yea
[Angel] yea
[Devil] oh yea
[Shy] sometimes
[Talkative] all the time

05:33 pm: reading time

05:32 pm: building the tabernackle

05:32 pm: quiet time

05:32 pm: praise team

05:31 pm:

05:31 pm:

05:31 pm: brenda

05:31 pm: jered

05:31 pm: jeremiah